yawn... I am sleepy...

Some days it is hard to be a mommy. Today is my day. I feel like I have nothing going in the right direction today or maybe I need to go back to bed and get up on the other side. Today I need to remember that:

Bode is three and doesn't need to sleep in.

-Bode is a good sleeper, always has been. But these days he gets up so early and demands food. For some reason this really makes me so frustrated with him right first thing in the morning. He is a growing boy and I love the little stink.

It is ok my house is messy. It can be clean later.

-We have just gotten home after being gone for 7+ days. My house is a wreck. This always puts me in a grumpy mood. Will there ever be a point in my life when I can not be so fanatic about keeping my house clean? I am not talking about just letting it go and start growing a mold farm, but just that shoes on the floor or a few dishes on the counter won't drive me crazy? Jer is always good to remind me that the house can wait and to enjoy the small moments with my family. I need to let that sink in a little more.

I need to patient with Laine.

-I have been nursing Laine and have actually really enjoyed it much more that I thought I would. With Bode it was so much more of a struggle. He was always crying and hungry. Well Laine is now 4 months old and I have decided to start to wean her. I have been so drained the last few weeks with nursing her. I am always hungry, have stalled on losing weight, I can't leave her, and Jer can't help comfort her. All these things have made me unhappy with myself and with my little family. As I type these things I sound so selfish. But I know that if I feel better about myself then I will be better prepared to take care of my family. The most frustrating thing it that she hates sucking on a bottle. It takes like and hour for her so get down a few ounces. I never believed in "nipple confusion" until now. Bode just went back and forth like it was no big deal. However Laine doesn't do as well. It is comical and frustrating at the same time. Her little tongue just can't latch onto the bottle. It makes my heart break to watcher her struggle with it. But she eventually, after a big fight, will take the bottle. I guess we will see how this goes.

I was blog hopping one day and came across this thought. It goes something like this. We make lots of goals. Big ones and small ones. It can be hard to accomplish these goals. It can be daunting to start a goal like "I am going to lose 20lbs". To get to the end of that goal it takes small and persistent efforts to make the goal become a reality. So to make the goal become a reality and not just something you say do this. Get a blank piece of paper every morning and write down your goals for the day. Because you can't lose 20lbs in a day , all the laundry won't be done in one day and all those other big things you want to do but are to big to accomplish in try. I am horrible at follow through, but I am going to try this out for a week and see how it works out for me. I am a "list" person so I am hoping that it will help me out. Hopefully it will work for me.